De(vi)licate in me!!!

Frantic, Morbid fear, Feeling Paranoid, Uncertain outcome, and no logical explanation still “DEMONS”, “GHOSTS” and “DEVILS” were so close to my heart out of fear. When I was young, the interest that I generated towards them was weird. My gut feeling would give me loads of courage to with stand the chill running down my spine and confront the deepest fear as though a warrior of a huge battle. However the real “ME” would warn me not to fall for this ruthless logic.

Eire movies were the target to quench my search and thirst!  At the same time, my parents had a tough time in the night to console my plight. There would be a sudden promise (like a new boyfriend or girlfriend that says “I would never let you go away from me”) that I would never watch these kind of movies thereafter. Followed by heavy prayers to god and goddess to save me from the sleeplessness zoned feeling. Incidentally “all was well” in the next morning and I was back to square one to boast to my friends as to how I withstood the devil’s advocate, demon’s own law and ghost’s gruesome ideas!!! Actually I had grown up with a brother and sisters in my house, and never stayed alone! This gave me a big bolster to fall back on and could fight against my silly beliefs.

Nature had different plans…married to a Navy officer who does duties besides sailing left, right and Centre made me puzzled. My smartest husband did not tell a single word about his night duties before our wedding and I was completely ignorant about it. It was one month after our wedding…it was his turn to do the night shift, He was on leave and people were waiting for him to take over. I was a happy newly married young girl who was not aware of anything like this called OD (officer of the day) roaster, Duty on Sundays or holidays, also have to do night flying (he is a Naval Aviator)

It was a party and we felt overwhelmed as the seniors treated us very well. I was almost flying in air without any Navy helicopter. And the clock stuck 23 hrs (11pm) my husband told me that we had to leave, I asked him like a child…but why? And I felt the bomb shelling…when he confessed that he was on OD duty and he had to go immediately. I was cursing my stars and my crying spell continued even after reaching home! Then…pleaded him not to leave with ghosts as I was scared to stay alone in the house! Nothing worked…Military man…after all, he just left for his commitment. There were no parents and siblings to feel for me and I was scared to death till it was dawn. Subsequent duty days were taken care by my neighbor’s daughters as their parents were kind enough to send them to be with me. Such a great relief to have someone at home in the huge house!

Once my daughter was born, things changed to a larger extent as she would never sleep early. Her active time begins at 12 in the night, therefore I forgot all my fear and got used to taking care of her vigilantly. The same demons became friendly to me and sometimes they were invited home to put my daughter to sleep. Later…whenever my husband would say that he is on duty, I would never react badly because duty is much better than sailing (Harsh truth)

I don’t say that I have conquered my fear yet I am not the same girl who was melodramatic! Paradoxically, The Devils have helped me to come out from this “delicate darling” Vindya syndrome to be a more determined woman! 

Is our life "jinga lalaa?"

It is a rainy day…and Kerala is famous for it, I sat in the balcony to enjoy the fresh mixture of mud and water, droplets from the sky, the cool air, and also the most synchronized noise of this sudden down pour…with a cup of coffee!

People are running and looking for a shelter and the ones with umbrellas are marching against the challenges to reach their destination. I started thinking…about the inconveniences and the external barriers of our life. A few questions that were distracting me was…Are we all happy?  What is our mind set?

Once again, professional way of thinking has hit my brain and the left brain in me suddenly felt fresh (because I hardly use it) to analyze things logically! The generations and their thinking pattern, became the incessant thought and I did a deep search to arrive at some convincing points.

It is a profound one, however the person who stroked my mind was none other than the genius “Maslow” and his theories. I wanted to compare all the three generations and I feel that I am one of the victims of confused 70s born. Because my generation had witnessed black and white TV (later color TV of course) and only with two channels to fall back on, experienced life without even a land line connection and only a few friends in touch with during vacation. We are neither too old nor too young to feel “cool”

And the HR in me woke up again…to come up with a statement that “Diversity is the mother of Progression”

Older generation wanted to be one trick pony, Retirement from the same company in a graceful manner, ample amount of Savings, many were blessed with more than five children therefore planned their future to be safe and secure and the best is… they lived happily…!

And the Next ones…who belong to my era…would like to look for benefits, switching over to another job was done diligently, these people have multi-tasking ability as the zeal in them to update with the younger generation put them on grind to learn. Looked for opportunities to learn while doing their job and took a break once a year to unleash themselves! Yet, they worry about their future because saving is not enough to survive, so always in the rat race knowingly and unknowingly, and sometimes with right competitors and sadly with not so good ones too!

Today’s “Y” generation wants to take up the job for a specified time period. They are bold to follow their passion, still Money is very important to them! They understand the spoken and unspoken words of others, however the reaction is mostly not direct and immediate, they calibrate in a corporate way! Believes in Sabbatical, and take the risk of going off track and explore life in a path what they believe to get complete satisfaction. Going on Holidays are part of their life style and thus there is no culture of saving at all. When they work they work like donkeys and when they party they party as though there is no tomorrow!

One cup of coffee brought me many data of human behavior!!!  I am thanking Maslow once again as he explained the different needs very clearly. So my conclusion is when the basic needs are fulfilled we tend to identify ourselves and happiness quotient changes to a larger extent. This shows that we have progressed..!!! 

One Master and Many voices!!!

Salman Khan...the star! Finally found guilty for his act. Happy with the verdict, though delayed but not denied. He is a person who goes out of his to way to help and spends on charity. However the way he delayed and manipulated his statements is seriously not acceptable. 
And now...seeking bail on Neuro- ailment issue. Jail will bring him trauma! Utter Farce...how can people argue like this to escape? 
Every victim goes through this kind of mental turbulence when they are put in jail. What is the difference? HE is SALMAN!!! The ultimate show man..!

All is fair in love and war..and now even for Bollywood actors too! Because they are not fighting in high altitudes, but total disposition of their attitude! They are not anchored at the middle of the sea but surely their greediness is out to "see" and lastly they are not in a fighter aircraft..and they are fighting with normal blokes!!! 

Will he ever answer to his inner voice? Can he not feel guilty? Is real and reel life one and the same? And the entire Bollywood clowns are in favor of him. because..he is well connected!!! All worry about their own future. Half of the victims have fled to their home town. And the so called compensation is quite negligible as they are incapable of taking up any major work due to the injury. 

Role models have to lead by example. Manipulation, aggression, showing authority and silently operating his moves to delay exhibits the true colour of him. Poor taste...For what? Just to act in more movies, endorsements..etc. 
No-one is indispensable and all his social work can continue. Its repulsive to read all the glib excuses. 

Its better to be an ordinary simple person without any curse than to flaunt in a swanky car, lives in galaxy...and claim to fool people that I believe in "being human". 

People can pray for him..but he has to endure the term if he is a human being!

We the Muggles crib...he the "Salman" conquers!!!