Baapu re Bapu!!!

Another long weekend to unleash, The dissatisfied “Maha atma” in us has genuinely calculated and waited for this break!!! So chill…

Great Indians that we are…we follow his words religiously, because it is giving more gain personally.

1.       Non-cooperation – yes, among the parties in order to prove them that they are different. Though it is a reflection of their inflated ego status, we the People do not understand the political game behind it.

2.       Quit India – yes, for “brain- drain or brain – gain” but surely for better opportunities, and they should never think of coming back because their status is more important for our placement in the global map.  Also…Quit India – to feel happy and freedom from pollution, pits on the roads, populated areas, politics, and prohibitions of course the porn ban.

3.       Clean India – it is our National Mission which we follow only on special days to get lime light and upload pictures on social media. We need celebrities to educate on this topic, as parents we fail to teach and inculcate good habits right from the childhood.

4.       Buy Indian clothes – the less said is better, because globalization has made us to succumb to buy designer clothes so that our “Image” is maintained.

5.       The three monkeys – This made us “unaffected” for all the happenings around us. Become blind, deaf and dumb only then we can breathe easily.

6.       Freedom Struggle – This is applicable to all the Maoists and terrorists to fight for their rights and in fact they are doing a fantastic job!!!

7.       Non- violence – it is an alien word in this present scenario however the people of India the genuine tax payers do still believe in this. And hence avoid voicing their opinion on any platform.

I am not an ardent fan of Gandhiji but I always wondered on his ability to unite this country without changing any of his profile picture in “tri colour” in any social media. His letters from Jail and the messages would reach all corners and created a cascading effect emotionally. I truly admire him for this remarkable achievement. And wishing him a very happy birthday and never ever come back to India because your ideas are out dated now! They may be politically correct however practically incorrect.

So…friends enjoy this weekend, liquor ban is everywhere today. But we are smart we will find a way out! Metro rail work is on…still we will go out! New movies are released so go and watch…It is a label that you have spent your weekend happily.  

Cheers and Happy Gandhi Jayanthi! 

Being Indian!!!

Being an Indian… “Is it clearly depicted in Karan Johar’s movies?”

A family who can speak flawless Hindi or their mother tongue even after spending more than two decades in the western countries.  All belong to an immaculate cluster and therefore children will listen to their parents, follow the Hindu rituals correctly.  This gives more clarity on Nonresident Indians.

 But who is called an Indian? We have celebrated Independence Day quite recently, and these questions put me in a confused state. Are we really free to do anything in this democratic country? And how can we define an Indian?

There are some default behaviors that we can boast about and few of the newly added laws have curtailed our freedom a bit more!

1.     Hard core Non vegetarians cannot eat what they want to eat.

2.     Some of the sites are prohibited completely, movies are banned, party time is restricted, and few books are not allowed to get published. However we are convinced that our entertainment supply is sumptuous.

3.     If we voice our opinion on any of the politician in the social media, we may be arrested.

4.     It is not safe to travel or be out in the late evenings even in metro cities.

5.     We believe in “Swaraj is our birth right!” But how many girl children are killed even before they take birth?

6.     When a girl / woman is raped and tarnished to death is given a title as an accused. Because she should have avoided provocative dressings or should not have ventured out of the house!

7.     Free bees are our universal weakness, and powerful people can buy the country by offering them on super discounts!

8.     Laws are tilted towards well-known people to escape through even from a tiny window. And poor remain as poor and Rich are getting richer.

9.     One third of the youth is aiming to go abroad to study and eventually to get settled down, and the other two thirds is like half cooked meat. We can neither have it nor throw it. So they wait for the right amount of heat ( experience or job)

10.                        Education is our primary concern but should not question the rulers on the constant changes in the system.

11.                        “Morality” is the loudest talk of the town so we oblige to moral policing.

12.                         Power cut, Traffic system, Roads, Pollution, Employment, Interstate issues for water and Electricity have taken permanent seats in the band wagon. Hence our tolerance level has become higher than the Mount Everest!

To conclude…freedom is not something that we have to accept for whatever is offered! It is time for us to make the rulers understand what we actually want! Demand…demand…and demand!!! No compromise on the quality of life as we have the right to live freely!

MIXED DOUBLES (Story)

“If you believe in Miracle, then you believe in love!!!”

Ajay kept looking at the line on the screen, lip reading it for the fifth time.  All the stress he was going through was kind of vexing but he had a very sheepish smile when he read it again. A strong disbeliever in the “concept of falling in love”, he found that the words on the screen were quite appropriate.  

Yes…Miracles happen rarely and to a few people, in the same way…Love is not everyone’s cup of tea.

Dr. Ajay’s looks reminded one of the “Roja” movie hero Arvind Swamy but his personality suited his profession very well. He had a dimpled smile and a very approachable yet macho demeanor. He was only 27 years old, and had seen half of his life by then.  Yes…a divorcee, rejected by his Ex-wife!!! Also denied by a few more women, because of their “forward thinking question” like “Is it okay if I go out with other guys also?” Ajay was a victim of one woman syndrome! It is quite a rare phenomenon in today’s fast world. As both men and women make instant decisions which lead to more choices. However Dr. Ajay wanted to be loyal to whoever he wanted to commit. 

It was a Friday, and he wished it to be one of the best days. There was no really free weekend to look forward to as his service may be required at any time. The people of the town considered it to be a city. And Dr. Ajay was not spared even during weekends, the sincere Doctor likes these unplanned calls because it helps him kill his boredom constructively. The day began with too many patients. Due to sudden rains, viral fever got spread rampantly, and the clinic was full of sobbing parents and crying babies.

By the end of the day…the clinic became almost empty and he realized that he had not had his lunch, with a hopeful smile he opened the drawer and checked for any special calls or messages. He felt disappointed as there was nothing waiting for him. Some unattractive numbers reminded a few more pending works.  The Doctor of the town consoled himself and went to the hotel nearby to have some snacks along with a cup of coffee.

He saw a young couple at the right corner table, the girl looked submissive, elegant but hesitant and with a pleading pair of eyes and the man perhaps her husband had an inflated “beer” belly, tall, clean shaven chocolate boy image however displayed spastic attitude towards the girl. Ajay tried to calibrate their mental status by observing them calmly and intensely.  His hunger pang was not in the priority list then, the more he observed the more he felt strong to continue. Just ordered for a “Paav bhaji” and a cup of coffee…Ajay decided to pay more attention to understand the conversation.

“What do you mean by this?”

You know exactly what I meant, a USA return can’t understand this???!!!

Girl was about to weep now…and pleaded him, you could have questioned me for all these before marriage itself. This embarrasses me and for god’s sake….please stop this.

I just wanted to have clarification for my own satisfaction, when you claim that you are clean…why not undergo this?

See…I am ready to do anything for you provided you put me in the comfort zone, this is more like a force and disbelieving my words make me feel so low and cheap…the girl blurted out with conviction.

I am not a fool, I have many friends who lived in the western countries.  They have shared their stories to me and I have never discussed or disclosed to anyone and they are my friends till date. What is your problem to undergo this small test?

There was a long spell of silence after this like a status of calm after the storm, and the man kept looking at her restlessly. But she ignored him by keeping her head down and Ajay could see her tears trickling down very slowly.

“I am dropping you home because I have an official tour to go to Bangalore.  I could have avoided it, but complied with my boss because you will get enough time to think. And also people will not get an idea of our disagreement. I shall be back in three days, so be a smart girl and be my wife!!!” the man barked!

The last line slaughtered her completely! “My wife”! What does he mean by this? Are there any distinct benefits or qualities one should possess to be his wife? What is happening to me? Can I talk to my parents about his orthodox mind set? Am I losing out my self-esteem now? Will he be suspicious even in future? Is this my “agnee parkishaa”? Do I need to prove? And for what? To be Mrs. Manish? There was a web of confusion and unwanted questions created ripples in her disturbed mind.

He stormed out, and she quietly followed.

Dr. Ajay understood her plight now and thought to himself that medical science is advanced for a positive and healthy life however the mind set of people is pathetic.

The next day, Ajay was astonished to see the girl in the OPD. She argued with the attendant not to write anything except her name and age on the form.  Attendant was not convinced and kept insisting on that it was a general practice to mention the complaint in order to enable the Doctor to address it easily. The girl was strong and told the attendant that it was for a specific consultation hence she should not be asked these mundane questions. 

Somehow she managed to get away from the “not so smart” attendant and proceeded to Dr. Ajay.

Ajay was watching everything with a smile, he knew the case but did not know how he could help her. She made a dashing entry and asked confidently “May I sit Doctor?”

Ajay liked that gait in her, wanted to sing the song…” tune maari entryaan dil mein bhaji gantiyaan” but got back to sense quickly,  Yes...Madam you can take your seat, he said it softly.

She introduced herself using some of the corporate phrases. “I am Sandhya, 27 years old, worked for an MNC in India for two years and shifted to the USA for a year. My domain was investment banking and held the responsibility of retaining our esteemed clients. We followed customer ready pattern and for this purpose I had to be socially active. It was more of a field job than a white collar job. I have made a lot of contacts and thus it became easy for me to achieve my set targets. All went on so well, however my five days old marriage is in a danger zone now. My husband wanted me to undergo   “virginity test” as he has a feeling that I may not be one! This is so because I lived in the USA for a year and my job demanded an erratic schedule.

Ajay listened to her patiently and in fact he enjoyed looking at her. She has soft eyes but medium size, quite fair in complexion, long curly hair enhanced her personality, hand gestures are typical lady like and the language was flawless.

With an assuring look, he asked her calmly….How could I help you in this regard? This town is big, however you still have to travel to a big city for these kind of tests, because things have to be confidential. And it is not possible in developing towns like these. You can take my number and call me tomorrow. I have friends who can supply information regarding this. And may I ask you something? Ajay mustered some guts to ventilate what was in his heart.

 She said…yes Doctor!

“Are you willing to go for it whole heartedly?” somehow Ajay probed this question. She felt depressed and eyes became smaller in size, she confessed in an unattractive tone that she did not want to! But continued that she had no other choice to save her marriage! Dr. Ajay anticipated for this sensitive moment and asked her politely “Did she really want to save her marriage?” and continued…Ms. Sandhya, I am sorry! This is your personal issue. But I could not control myself from revealing it because I saw you both in the Restaurant yesterday evening. The discussion was not at all healthy and warm. A man can be high-testosterone type, good looking, educated but if he can watch a woman’s cry without any reaction is certainly not a “MAN”. 

This is my view… you need not have to oblige! Forget everything…but remember only one thing in life…”relationship is worth fighting for and marriage is an institution but it takes two to tango! Fighting alone needs lot of patience and support. Do you have it in you now?”

Sandhya thanked him for his power packed words. She took the business card from Ajay and promised him to call in a day or two. The Doctor could see a slight change in her poise now, looked more confident and also saw radiance in her smile. This made him happy and felt that Sandhya should have a wonderful married life!

He made genuine efforts to get information for Sandhya and kept all details ready at the office, and also one more copy at his room. Because he wanted to help this corporate woman like a true gentleman. At the same time, his shameless heart popped up cutely to tell him that she is in his heart! And he started thinking about her relentlessly and it often brought a sparkling smile on Ajay’s face whenever he thought about her. Days and months have passed, he did not receive any calls or a message from her.

The prolonged absence without any clue made him feel weak mentally and he was losing his temper quite frequently. He embraced solitude and books were his best company. He put on weight and grew beard to have a serious and unapproachable look for people around him. A year has passed and Ajay continued to work in the same clinic.

On a Sunday, he was relaxing after his lunch. He got a call from an unknown number. He hated to take calls from strangers on a week end because it often engages him for a new work. So he took the call unenthusiastically and said…Hello…Dr. Ajay here!

And the other side sweetly tweeted through her voice…..Hello Doctor…this is Sandhya here! Hope you remember me. I had come to your clinic…..

Ajay interrupted like a manner less child and said….I distinctly remember you.  Where have you undergone the test?  Hope you are out of the danger zone. And I had waited for your calls with all the details… he kept on going….

Sandhya interrupted and spoke like a chirpy bird…Doctor….Ajay..!!! Will you let me complete?

This made Ajay’s excited mind to become placid instantly..!!! Tried his best to act normal…and said…yeah please, go ahead!

Sandhya apologized for not contacting him for any details. But she asked him if he was free in the evening, and she expressed her desire to meet him personally. Ajay was over whelmed and felt like singing… “ arrey re arrey re kya huva! Mein nahin jaanaa…” it is like bursting flower pots in his garden with full zest. However he tried his best to mask all his emotions, and answered her that he could meet her in the evening at the same clinic.  She agreed and told him that she would be there by 6.30 pm.

Ajay had a mixed feeling, Is there anything that I can expect from her? Is this meeting going to be a formal one? Perhaps a thanks giving one? With all these questions agitating in his mind he was not able to control himself. But slept like a log in anxiety. When he woke up, it was 7pm and there were fifteen miss calls from “Sandhya”!!! He felt stupid and cursed himself for being so irresponsible. But without further delay, he called her immediately. Sandhya was on her way back home, and attended the call very politely. With her honey drenched voice…asked him “Were you busy with some patient?” I am sorry, called you so many times.

Ajay was dumbfounded and felt…what an idiot I am! But his heart felt the distraction so he prayed…“oh god! Please bless me abundantly so that I can marry this sweet girl”. And replied to her that he was sorry for not taking her calls. He refrained himself from   giving any reason because that might mar his image.  Also he did not want to lose the opportunity, therefore asked her to come to the Reliance mall. She agreed happily without any further negotiations.

The mall was decorated as lot of sale was going on and since it was a Sunday crowd was much more than on a regular day. He wondered that how come people have so much money to spend in Malls? But still we claim that India is a poor country! He bought a chocolate for her and a card asking “Sorry!” Without thinking cautiously on the consequences of the meeting he truly enjoyed doing all this.  

Sandhya the angel of Ajay’s heart, arrived soon and gave a bright smile towards him. But her eye brows twitched to see him with a fully grown beard. Ajay smiled back and said, “I am elated to know that you could recognize me”. She conveyed her reply in a simple smile. And they proceeded to the foot court and ordered for a fresh juice.

So Ms. Sandhya, how is life? And you have not changed at all…looking the same, he started. The mettle lady told him that it was nice that he remembered her so much. (Ajay thought to himself that “when did I forget you sweets to remember you? You have swept me off and I am clean bowled with your awestruck personality”) and she continued that there are a lot of things to share and also wanted to thank him personally.

“Thank me personally?” for what??? Ajay got little serious now!

Yes…Doctor, she began to unleash herself….Dr. Ajay, I have to thank you for all the words that you spoke out fearlessly on that day when I came to meet you at the clinic. Your one question changed my life and that was, “Do you have it in you now? “it was my turning point and also to gain my self-esteem back. I didn’t go through any test, and I am legally separated from Manish, my ex-husband.  I shifted back to the USA about eight months ago…recently I came to know that you are also a divorcee, I felt like meeting you because my respect for you got converted into emotions. I truly felt refreshed after our first meet at the Clinic. Your outlook towards life is impressive, even after going through series of traumatic events. I can understand now, “what is a divorce? Whether it is after a few years or after some (countable) days! 

The pain is acute to accept that one is being rejected.”

And we share the same platform in this regard, my heart melts every time when I think about you. I have to confess to you that if I undergo the test now, the result will be negative. Yes…I am not a virgin anymore! 

And If you are fine with my past, “May we share our future together?” she finished with a deep look.

Ajay was dumbstruck!!!

He craved to celebrate the moment by singing a happy song…and thought, “oh my god!!! What a girl she is!!!” an independent thinker, modest, beautiful, confident and at the same time can show her emotions directly like a guided dart. Her attitude attracted him a lot more than anything. Unlike his ex-wife, Sandhya was not arrogant though she had all the qualities to be one.

He was enthralled by her words which made him quiet for a few minutes…but slowly and softly said, “Yes! I will be the luckiest man on the earth if I can marry you”! And looked at her…They both smiled but it was a meaningful smile, very profound, typical soul mates feelings that they could experience. To retain the excitement, “Ajay started to spice it up…fine! Let us have an agreement as to what we expect from each other!!! She laughed and conveyed “Ladies first”.

She gave her list…

1.    Have to say every day that I look beautiful

2.    No cooking on Sundays

3.    One exclusive bike ride every week

4.    Have to appreciate all the gifts that I purchase for you, no nasty comments!

5.    Should never go off to sleep when I am talking to you ( and I am quite a talkative girl)

6.    Music is my interest so I may like listen to it all alone!

Ajay asked her….where were you before? I was expecting some big damage for my pocket…and all your demands are so naïve and I am so blessed to have you. In his ecstatic status, Ajay told her that I have nothing to say, except only one thing… “Please be with me forever”!

She held his hand tight…and that gesture gave him the assurance of their bonding! And she said…This world looks so beautiful Ajay and that is because of you! He winked at her and said…it will be always my Senorita!

"Love"! Love my dear...

“It is time to get up…the time is 7 o clock, it is time to get up...the time is 7 o clock….

Eieeeeeeeeeeeeee….Akanksha just realized that she forgot to switch off the alarm alert last night!

Night???

She slept around 5 o clock in the morning though. Face book and Whatsapp have become a part of her life. And especially for this weekend as she decided not to go out anywhere with friends. The reason was…”HIM”!!!

Out of curiosity, kept her half eyes opened to see whether there are any miss calls or messages from “HIM”. She felt as though she is the queen of Mumbai when saw a call registered at around 6.30 from “HIM!” This bolstered her ego up and decided to doze off for a few more hours. But sleep has taken a back seat by then since her eyes became moist and thoughts train applied the reverse gear and she went into her own happy world of “HIM” and her.

Sanjay…her special friend whom she met through a social network in a group. Both belong to the same state and working in Mumbai, hence it was their common interest to talk and use all the abusive words of their mother tongue to add flavor in the conversation. He enjoyed her style of communication and Akanksha felt comfortable in his company.

Vashi and Andheri (Mumbai suburbs) are commutable but not on a daily basis especially after their long working hours. So they met on weekends to catch up for a movie or for just to hang around in any swanky mall. This went on for six months, and once in a relaxed mood…Sanjay told her that hey…Akku I am trying for onsite projects and likely to leave by September.

Akku: ok idiot…go!

Sanjay: idiots don’t get to go to UK. So I am not an idiot…”devil girl”.

Akku: Yes…idiots don’t leave me and go, you are smart! Fine…

Sanjay : What do you mean? And who said I am going to leave you, digital world is our boon. Many means and so…many ways!

Akku:  yeah….but you want to go? Is that clear right?

Sanjay: hmmm….what do you want me to do? And why this much emotion?

Akku: Are you a moron? I think…you have to agree on this today, dumb engineer, heartless bloke….

Sanjay: I really thought you will encourage me and come up with some shopping list and all, also excited to plan for a holiday sometimes together in UK. It is strange to see your reaction.

Akku: Fine, best wishes for your onsite project, thanks for all the holiday plans. I don’t think I will ever do it. Let us have something and go…I am not feeling easy.

Sanjay: hey you are out of sync today, no problems babes! How about pizza hut? I will have vegetarian today along with you.

Akku: No Sanjay, pls don’t do anything for me, anyways…you will have to get used to all non-veg stuff only in the near future. So eat sumptuously as per your choice!

Sanjay: ok darling…as you say

Pizza hut is a place, where anyone can enjoy irrespective of the age. Both parked themselves in a centrally located table, as she felt that there was nothing special that day to go to a cozy cornered one. And subtle music from the speaker…”Pehlapehlapyarhei…pehalipaehalibaarhein”, Akanksha thought of Arvind her first love and Sanjay tried hard to hide his smile, thinking of Nandhini. Both smiled at each other nonchalantly.

It was she who broke the vacuum around the air and said…can we order for something?

Sanjay came back from his quick trance and replied…yes your honor! Anything for you!!! Akanksha was sulking from inside and repeated his words “ANYTHING FOR YOU”. Without wasting time on any more discussions, the day ended amicably as she decided not to utter one word about his onsite project.

The entire week, went off in an informal good morning messages and some forwards from Sanjay. She maintained her composure and carried on with her routine job in the office. However, her heart was melting to meet him and to make him understand how much she was missing him. A Strong Leo girl wanted to keep herself in control, so abstained completely.

And Sanjay did not make any calls during the week days as he got really busy with his ongoing project also spent late nights in the office, foregone food, and followed an erratic sleep pattern. He thought of her when he wanted to feel stress free, took the mobile phone…checked her profile, enjoyed looking at her picture. Suddenly, a thunder striking thought stroked him….Does she love me? Or Am I in love with her? Am I missing her? Will I always miss her if this is going to be my routine?

But he did not want to invest more time on this because his work was not getting over. And he seriously needed some rest. So once again, looked at her photo and said to himself…sweet heart, I will be happy if you will be mine, but now…my project is the villain and I must meet you soon.

Akanksha went off to sleep with her thoughts, and woke up again because her mobile was ringing with a beautiful voice, and that was her mother!!!

Hiiiiiiiiii Mummy,

Mom: Hope you are up!

Akku: yes…ma, wassup?

Mom: Akku, I called to tell you two things, one is your whatsappDp is very nice. And the second thing is, you have to attend a wedding anniversary party of Joshi uncle. They have completed 25 years of togetherness today. Since you are in Bombay, you must go!

Akku: Omg!!!! This is not happening ma. Please…I want to sleep. Let me live without all these commitments!!!

Mom: what do you mean by this? They both were there with us in the hospital on the day you were born. Don’t be so calculative…you should go! I know you have not worn saree for a long time, this is your chance to show me also. I am waiting to see you nicely dressed up in a saree

Akku: Mummy pls………. what is this? Dont come up with all your usual tactics. I understand, fine I will think about it. Let me sleep now. Byeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

Mom:  see...I will text you the address, you are GOING!!! Ok bye…

Akanksha was seriously not interested to meet anyone, her only attraction was for a variety of best food in the party. So she changed her mind and booked a cab for herself. As per her mother’s instructions she wore a nice chiffon saree, bought a small Ganesh statue and a bouquet.

The party was in a banquet hall at a famous hotel, Joshi’s were rich of course! Also they spend lavishly in parties. As she entered Savvy Aunty welcomed her with a genuine wide smile. Akanksha could sense the happiness of the couple in their eyes. This made her smile from her heart and handed over the gift and the bouquet. Savvy reluctantly agreed but with a smile.

Akanksha chose a nice table to sit and started making random conversation with people around, there were a lot of goodies in the party for people who are fond of eating. She saw a pizza corner, and thought of Sanjay immediately. Then curtailed her anxiety and decided to eat something else.  She went to the south Indian display of mouthwatering dosas and ordered for a masala dosa!!!

It used to be my regular diet during the college days, my god…time just flew. She pondered on to herself till the dosa arrived. 

With great difficulty to manage the flimsy chiffon saree, Akanksha came to a conclusion that it would be better to sit down and have the grub peacefully.

Savvy aunty came closer…and asked her, “Beta...there are many varieties to eat! You must taste everything!”Akanksha assured her that she would try a few more!  While having the dosa, she realized that she is in love with Sanjay, but he is not! And it is time for her to act like a mature girl and should not mess up things. But it is very difficult to suppress and smile like this when she wanted to be alone!!!

Savvy came to the dosa counter to be with her friends for a while, and smiled at Akanksha again. And this time the ladies started talking to each other about their husbands. Also questioning Savvy about their first meeting and the journey of twenty five years. 

A composed woman Savvy never showed her emotions openly at any of point of time. So when questioned in a gathering like this, she was not though comfortable but went ahead to disclose to her friends and Akanksha who also joined the conversation that her husband started saying the three magic words “ I love you” quite recently. The affection they both have for each other was never told but always demonstrated by giving respect and space.

She continued breathlessly that we do have disagreements but we don’t give life to it. And this makes me feel that, “The secret of a successful relationship lies in the simplest of things: “Believe in small pleasures and trust on the untold love” because love is too precious to earn and even more precious to let go! Our love is like a rainbow, may not be able to see it daily. However, “we know that it is existing and this trust makes us feel delighted in each other’s company!”

Once Savvy finished this…people were astounded and a single tear slid down on her cheek! And she regained her smile and called everyone to join for a dance masti to the floor.

Akanksha felt that she knew something now, clouds are clearing and she could see a thin silver line and she is beginning to understand the chemical mixture of her mind and heart. Inspired from a not so expressive couple she felt the warmth in her heart for Sanjay. Her girlish, ladylike and womanly emotions all have joined the bandwagon together to tell her that she is in Love again!!!

Tearing through the polluted Mumbai wind…she grabbed her phone and dialed his number! Within one ring, Sanjay picked up the call and said…Devil girl...where were you? I was missing you like hell. And Akku happily said…I was practicing alone as to how to drink your blood before you leave for UK.

Actually Akku…you are a baby doll…Sanjay muttered! Akanksha did not want to say anything… her silence conveyed everything!!!

To Daddies with love...

Father’s day is just got over. I did get to see loads of photos and loving words from children on Facebook and messages. Once such cliche which is circulated the most was “Anyone can become a father but it takes effort to be a daddy”. The rebel in me woke up without an alarm to jot down my views.

Daddy is just another synonym, In fact it is more informal and we can feel the proximity from our heart. And Father is always seen as a provider, this is what nature and society have made us believe. Most of the men harness his family and children in all possible ways to bring harmony to himself and also for his people.

Is it difficult to be a Father? NO...it is not, provided he is ready to become one truly from his heart. Because every child believes that his or her hero is their “father.” And for daughters he is the first man in her life. She compares, expects and accepts an opposite gender as her close mate when he has little streaks of the first man. So the creator sets the standard for his daughter. 

Lord Ganesh has refused to marry anyone because he wanted a girl like his own mother. This may be just a story, however a girl is still naïve and marries a person who can take care of her even with little comforts. After all, women seek validation from men.

So who is the FATHER? He is the one who is responsible for sculpting a woman, his approval and attitude are the primary cause for a girl to gain more self-esteem. Her subconscious mind will make her do wonders also can create positive vibes towards the society when she feels warmth from inside.

Men don’t need to feel proud to be a bio logical father, even a rapist can do that. A man who forgets his fatherly instincts and touches the Benjamin button when he sees an attractive woman or even just an ignorant child are not eligible for this title. It takes loads of responsibilities to hover and shower the required love till the end to be a Father.

Hero can break, make and talk at any time, situations may change…someone else may do the role however affection does not. Every man is a  father if he can nurture a child into a good human being.   

De(vi)licate in me!!!

Frantic, Morbid fear, Feeling Paranoid, Uncertain outcome, and no logical explanation still “DEMONS”, “GHOSTS” and “DEVILS” were so close to my heart out of fear. When I was young, the interest that I generated towards them was weird. My gut feeling would give me loads of courage to with stand the chill running down my spine and confront the deepest fear as though a warrior of a huge battle. However the real “ME” would warn me not to fall for this ruthless logic.

Eire movies were the target to quench my search and thirst!  At the same time, my parents had a tough time in the night to console my plight. There would be a sudden promise (like a new boyfriend or girlfriend that says “I would never let you go away from me”) that I would never watch these kind of movies thereafter. Followed by heavy prayers to god and goddess to save me from the sleeplessness zoned feeling. Incidentally “all was well” in the next morning and I was back to square one to boast to my friends as to how I withstood the devil’s advocate, demon’s own law and ghost’s gruesome ideas!!! Actually I had grown up with a brother and sisters in my house, and never stayed alone! This gave me a big bolster to fall back on and could fight against my silly beliefs.

Nature had different plans…married to a Navy officer who does duties besides sailing left, right and Centre made me puzzled. My smartest husband did not tell a single word about his night duties before our wedding and I was completely ignorant about it. It was one month after our wedding…it was his turn to do the night shift, He was on leave and people were waiting for him to take over. I was a happy newly married young girl who was not aware of anything like this called OD (officer of the day) roaster, Duty on Sundays or holidays, also have to do night flying (he is a Naval Aviator)

It was a party and we felt overwhelmed as the seniors treated us very well. I was almost flying in air without any Navy helicopter. And the clock stuck 23 hrs (11pm) my husband told me that we had to leave, I asked him like a child…but why? And I felt the bomb shelling…when he confessed that he was on OD duty and he had to go immediately. I was cursing my stars and my crying spell continued even after reaching home! Then…pleaded him not to leave with ghosts as I was scared to stay alone in the house! Nothing worked…Military man…after all, he just left for his commitment. There were no parents and siblings to feel for me and I was scared to death till it was dawn. Subsequent duty days were taken care by my neighbor’s daughters as their parents were kind enough to send them to be with me. Such a great relief to have someone at home in the huge house!

Once my daughter was born, things changed to a larger extent as she would never sleep early. Her active time begins at 12 in the night, therefore I forgot all my fear and got used to taking care of her vigilantly. The same demons became friendly to me and sometimes they were invited home to put my daughter to sleep. Later…whenever my husband would say that he is on duty, I would never react badly because duty is much better than sailing (Harsh truth)

I don’t say that I have conquered my fear yet I am not the same girl who was melodramatic! Paradoxically, The Devils have helped me to come out from this “delicate darling” Vindya syndrome to be a more determined woman! 

Is our life "jinga lalaa?"

It is a rainy day…and Kerala is famous for it, I sat in the balcony to enjoy the fresh mixture of mud and water, droplets from the sky, the cool air, and also the most synchronized noise of this sudden down pour…with a cup of coffee!

People are running and looking for a shelter and the ones with umbrellas are marching against the challenges to reach their destination. I started thinking…about the inconveniences and the external barriers of our life. A few questions that were distracting me was…Are we all happy?  What is our mind set?

Once again, professional way of thinking has hit my brain and the left brain in me suddenly felt fresh (because I hardly use it) to analyze things logically! The generations and their thinking pattern, became the incessant thought and I did a deep search to arrive at some convincing points.

It is a profound one, however the person who stroked my mind was none other than the genius “Maslow” and his theories. I wanted to compare all the three generations and I feel that I am one of the victims of confused 70s born. Because my generation had witnessed black and white TV (later color TV of course) and only with two channels to fall back on, experienced life without even a land line connection and only a few friends in touch with during vacation. We are neither too old nor too young to feel “cool”

And the HR in me woke up again…to come up with a statement that “Diversity is the mother of Progression”

Older generation wanted to be one trick pony, Retirement from the same company in a graceful manner, ample amount of Savings, many were blessed with more than five children therefore planned their future to be safe and secure and the best is… they lived happily…!

And the Next ones…who belong to my era…would like to look for benefits, switching over to another job was done diligently, these people have multi-tasking ability as the zeal in them to update with the younger generation put them on grind to learn. Looked for opportunities to learn while doing their job and took a break once a year to unleash themselves! Yet, they worry about their future because saving is not enough to survive, so always in the rat race knowingly and unknowingly, and sometimes with right competitors and sadly with not so good ones too!

Today’s “Y” generation wants to take up the job for a specified time period. They are bold to follow their passion, still Money is very important to them! They understand the spoken and unspoken words of others, however the reaction is mostly not direct and immediate, they calibrate in a corporate way! Believes in Sabbatical, and take the risk of going off track and explore life in a path what they believe to get complete satisfaction. Going on Holidays are part of their life style and thus there is no culture of saving at all. When they work they work like donkeys and when they party they party as though there is no tomorrow!

One cup of coffee brought me many data of human behavior!!!  I am thanking Maslow once again as he explained the different needs very clearly. So my conclusion is when the basic needs are fulfilled we tend to identify ourselves and happiness quotient changes to a larger extent. This shows that we have progressed..!!!